Oops! Here comes bub!
It’s taken a while, but here’s the story of my first birth!
Claire’s surprise homebirth - 2015
I always knew I wanted kids but didn't think much further than that. I didn't think about birth or how these babies would make their way into my arms. I started hearing lots of stories of intervention and birth trauma and thought there must be a better way because I refused to believe that my body was broken or that it wouldn't work the way it was supposed to (and if there were special circumstances I wanted to be fully aware of the situation and my options so that I could make informed decisions about my care rather than simply agreeing to whatever I was told just because it was routine or policy or because someone else thought it was best).
I investigated my options for childbirth education and ended up settling on the Hypnobirthing Australia™ Positive Birth Program. I completed the program with my partner when I was about 7 months pregnant with our first child. Everything we learnt really resonated with what I was feeling and validated my belief that I could birth my baby, my way. My partner learnt all the ways he could be really involved in supporting and advocating for me. We walked out of our last session out so excited, prepared and ready to have our amazing hospital water birth.
We spent the next couple of months practicing everything we had learnt to make sure we were as ready as we could be. I went on maternity leave at 36 weeks, and I was looking forward to a month or so of resting, nesting and preparing for the arrival of our little one.
Two weeks later, it was a Tuesday, I was 38+1 weeks pregnant, and I couldn’t get settled doing anything I usually did. I found myself pacing the house.
Then, in the mid-afternoon, I started to feel some tightenings… nothing intense, nothing painful, not even crampy, just tight. I messaged my partner to let him know that things might be getting started. He was heading to the shops after work and then coming home.
I phoned the birth unit at the public hospital where I was booked.
“It doesn’t sound like you’re in established labour, stay at home, take two paracetamol and have a lie down.”
Excellent. I didn’t want to go in yet anyway. I didn’t take the paracetamol as I had read this blog post. I went to have a lie down, thinking I should get some rest as labour could be long. Being my first baby I’m planning for 12+ hours.
I made it to about 20 seconds lying down. Nope. Not the position for me, it did not feel right. So, I though I’d try the positions I’d been practicing for the last couple of months. I sat on my birth ball and did spirals and pelvic tilts. Nope. Still not right. I stood and leant over the bed and swayed. Nope. Not it either.
Then I got in the shower. Amazing.
The warm water pulsing on my back and running over my belly. I leant against the wall of the shower, head on my arms, eyes closed. I have no idea how long I was in there for!
I got out after a while and called my partner to say that I’d like him to come home, I wanted him with me.
I called the birth unit again.
“It doesn’t sound like you’re in established labour, you’re talking and calm, stay home a bit longer”.
I moved back into the bedroom and tried the birth ball again with my partner there helping with all our wonderful hypnobirthing techniques that up until now I’d been utilising on my own. I was getting hot and then cold and then hot again (clearly there was something wrong with the air-con because it definitely couldn’t be that I was in transition!)
My partner called the birth unit. “It still doesn’t sound like established labour. Stay home until contractions are coming ever 2-3 minutes, lasting 1 minute for at least an hour.”
I vividly remember thinking, “I’m going to end up having this baby here.”
I moved to sitting on the toilet. Yes. Comfortable again at last.
I breathed, eyes closed, leaning forward, head in my hands to keep it dark, elbows on my knees. I was totally and completely focussed on breathing. Surrendered entirely to what my body and baby were doing. I still only felt tightness, no pain, no cramping. My partner was sitting on the floor next to me (squashed in our tiny ensuite!) encouraging and prompting me, and utilising our hypnobirthing techniques. (I have almost no memory of him doing all these things, I was so in the zone – thanks in part to his support! Weeks later I actually asked him if he even used any of our hypnobirthing techniques and he had to tell me!)
Suddenly my body is thrown forwards, convulsion-like, like when you vomit. I looked up at my partner, startled, “what the hell was that?!”
I got back into the zone. Then it happened again.
My body had totally taken over as the NER (natural expulsive reflex) kicked in, and with every surge, my body was rocking forwards with immense power. Still no pain and no cramping, just intense tightening.
I instinctively reached down.
“I can feel a head!”
It had been about 3 hours since those first tightenings.
We called the birth unit…
“You should be here…”
*face-palm*
“Don’t get in the car, call an ambulance.”
There was no way I was moving.
Paramedics didn’t want me in a hard to access ensuite… My partner helped me carefully move to a nest of blankets and towels on the bedroom floor.
I got down on my hands and knees. I already know my baby is crowning. Suddenly there’s a huge amount of pressure. Everything is expanding.
I had been silent through my surges until this moment.
I roared my baby earthside.
My partner caught our baby, waited for me to turn over and then placed our tiny human skin-to-skin on my chest and covered us with towels.
2 minutes later the paramedics were there.
They were very surprised to find us very happy, relaxing in our nest on the floor. They said it was time to cut the cord. I said no. They were at a bit of a loss as to what to do because we weren’t freaking out! So, they offered to take a photo of us – photo below courtesy of the two lovely NSW paramedics.
After waiting for the cord to stop pulsating, my partner cut the cord and we bundled onto the stretcher and headed to the hospital where we got checked out (found out that C was 3.86kg of perfection) and came home the next morning.
At no point during my labour or birth were we afraid or worried.
My partner was amazing, stayed by my side every moment and kept up with the encouragement and wonderful support. Thanks to our Hypnobirthing Australia™ classes we both knew that if it was all happening this quickly it was most likely an uncomplicated birth and so we just continued to trust the process.
What my partner has to say about the experience:
The birth was unexpected in almost every way. Quick, unexpected location and different to what we thought it might have been. However, at no time were we overwhelmed. I may have been perplexed and a little unsure at times, but the trust we had in each other made all the difference. I trusted Claire and her body to do whatever it needed to do. The Hypnobirthing classes we had done had given us the tools and strategies to foster an environment that was calm and relaxed.
Despite the unplanned and unexpected nature of the birth, Claire remained calm and slow which enabled me to do the same and to simply be a stable presence to support wherever was needed. The relaxation tools, affirmations, and light touch I had learned in our classes meant that I had helpful and useful tools that I could use to provide the support that was most helpful to Claire.
Plans change. The situation changed. But because we trusted each other and had tools and processes at our disposal, we were able to have a birth that was truly special and incredible.
To have just the 2 of us and no one else around to welcome our baby into the world was an awesome and incredible unplanned experience that we will never forget.
We love our birth story.
We love that it was just us in the room. We love that we were prepared for whatever path our birthing took. We love sharing our story.
Our birth didn’t go to plan. It wasn’t where I thought I’d be or with who I thought I’d be with.
It WAS a calm, positive, empowering experience that has changed our lives.
This wasn’t the plan… But it was AMAZING!!
Read our second child’s birth story HERE.
